It’s Not You.



3/10/25

That impostor syndrome you've been feeling? 

Maybe, it doesn't actually come from within you. Maybe it's more like something that's been pressed on us from the outside—that nagging feeling we're not good enough, that we have to constantly fight to prove ourselves, or that we're somehow unworthy, despite all the evidence of our accomplishments. It's even the reason we're in the rooms in the first place and we still don't feel we don't belong there. 

We all know what makes work environments difficult and when these places feel toxic or unsupportive, we've been conditioned to turn inward and blame ourselves instead of seeing the bigger picture.

Deeper psychological stuff plays into this too. Scarcity mindset, our complicated feelings about authority, and messages we've absorbed from society—they all contribute to us seeing a smaller version of ourselves that just isn't accurate.

And guess what? This happens to almost everyone—research shows most professionals experience impostor syndrome, even those people who seem totally confident all the time.

Some of the things that have worked for me and my clients are:

Notice when and where you feel inadequate or excluded
Ask yourself what's really causing these feelings
Find real evidence that proves the opposite
Write down this evidence and keep doing this

Keep going until you can clearly see both when your self-doubt shows up AND all the proof that you absolutely do belong and add value.

This approach lines up with what neuroscience tells us about how our brains handle negative thoughts versus actual evidence.

One more thing worth remembering: that impostor syndrome you're dealing with? Everyone else feels it too—even the leaders, executives, and seemingly super-confident people you look up to.

That tells me it's about our environment and culture, not about us as individuals.

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